I was reading some of my old posts, I like to re-visit my past, usually not so recent, but this time these were recent events.
As most of you know my blog only dates back about 6 months, so the feelings in there are still "fresh", if fresh is the right word to use.
Somehow, I always found serenity in re-visiting events, whether happy or sad events.
True, the last period was very turbulent, with lots of ups and downs, I had to throw away a lot of rudimentary elements of my life, the extraction was not easy, but I think it was well worth it.
The sacrifices that were made by some parties involved are well remembered and - hopefully - will be repaid, if I manage to get around to it.
The treacheries will also be well remembered, a lot of people showed their true colours.
But this is not what I'm here to speak of.
Along this brief period, I discovered that some people actually understood me more than my closest friends, more than my family even.
I also discovered that I'm no exception, I can be an ass when properly upset.
One of the most important things that I've found out is that I no longer need to go around in circles to get what I want, it was a major issue with me, I never ask for anything, I want it to be offered to me.
Last but not least I discovered that one sentence has turned my world around, to the better, this sentence made me know that I no longer need to bear with human parasites, it also made up my mind as to what I need to pursue.
One word can best describe the last 6 months, it's a word we all hate or dread, but it best describes it, "Purgatory"
6 comments:
"I never ask for anything, I want it to be offered to me"
YESS, sometimes something is completely meaningless if you ask for it, yet worth the world if offered... sadly enough, almost all things are like that for me!
liked the post
Very true, however this method is really frustrating on the long run, as in most cases you expect people to understand you just by looking at you.
It's all about motives at the end of the day, every person is an open book once you know what makes him tick.
The question is, have I become so used to hiding my motives for so long, that now I'm having difficulty being open about anything?
i guess we can all change, we all have it in us... it's just that you're too aware of your attempts of being open, so it feels "hard"... it gets some getting used to, as long as you want to be open about things... i think!
i think here ppl knows u better coz u allow them to, u say whatever comes to ur mind and not caring if they r going to judge u, that is why i consider the blog is a healthy evvironment.
nice evaluation.
I am glad you feel better and are now opened up about what you want more. I love how you want to change for making things better, you ARE AMAZING SLOPPY Mwah
Insomniac,
You're right about the awareness part, I think I'll get around to actually do it, what bothers me is that people don't give me a break when I'm trying to change, they point it out to me, whenever I wanna say something and hold back, or when I'm trying to say something and I'm hesitant about it, whenever it's pointed out, it makes me feel like I've made no progress.
Brownie,
Guess it's one of those old habits, reflecting on my past, trying to see the things I missed at the time.
Dearest SoU,
You of all people know what I'm going through, I really appreciate the support you're giving me.
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