Strange really, thought I knew better

Just sitting bored at work, waiting for Garada to finish so I can review his work and decided to put my unanswered questions on paper for a change, these have been so bottled up inside, they're about to explode.

1. When will I be my own master, aspiring to please only myself, not please everyone else around me?

2. Why do people aspire to hurt other people who've done nothing but defended themselves when need be?

3. What is it that runs through a murderer's mind when he pulls that trigger?

4. Why is it that everyone has something to prove, whether it's career or personal wise?

5. Is life about dominance or co-existence?

6. If I had my most mortal enemy under my mercy, would I finish him off or let him go?

7. Who am I, the one people see and know, or have I lied all my life and now I've believed my own lie?

8. Are principals there to govern us or help us run our life, which one bends, us or our principals?

These are most of the questions I had no answer to, I don't expect an answer, but I'm just mumbling to myself again

Found that quite funny, thought I'd share

These are actual answers on a McDonald’s application submitted by a 17 year old kid someplace in Florida. They actually hired him too. I think this kid’s gonna go far…

NAME: Greg Bulmash.

SEX: Not yet. Still waiting for the right person.

DESIRED POSITION: Company’s President or Vice President. But seriously, whatever’s available. If I was in a position to be picky, I wouldn’t be applying here in the first place.

DESIRED SALARY: $185,000 a year plus stock options and a Michael Ovitz style severance package. If that’s not possible, make an offer and we can haggle.

EDUCATION: Yes.

LAST POSITION HELD: Target for middle management hostility.

SALARY: Less than I’m worth.

MOST NOTABLE ACHIEVEMENT: My incredible collection of stolen pens and post-it notes.

REASON FOR LEAVING: It sucked.

HOURS AVAILABLE TO WORK: Any.

PREFERRED HOURS: 1:30-3:30 p.m., Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday.

DO YOU HAVE ANY SPECIAL SKILLS?: Yes, but they’re better suited to a more intimate environment.

MAY WE CONTACT YOUR CURRENT EMPLOYER?: If I had one, would I be here?

DO YOU HAVE ANY PHYSICAL CONDITIONS THAT WOULD PROHIBIT YOU FROM LIFTING UP TO 50 LBS?: Of what?

DO YOU HAVE A CAR?: I think the more appropriate question here would be “Do you have a car that runs?”

HAVE YOU RECEIVED ANY SPECIAL AWARDS OR RECOGNITION?: I may already be a winner of the Publishers Clearing house Sweepstakes.

DO YOU SMOKE?: On the job no, on my breaks yes.

WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE DOING IN FIVE YEARS?: Living in the Bahamas with a fabulously wealthy dumb sexy blonde super model who thinks I’m the greatest thing since sliced bread. Actually, I’d like to be doing that now.

DO YOU CERTIFY THAT THE ABOVE IS TRUE AND COMPLETE TO THE BEST OF YOUR KNOWLEDGE?: Yes. Absolutely.

SIGN HERE: Aries.

Don't feel like working

I don't wanna go to work today, have had this cold for 3 days now, I have nothing to do there today actually, except use the free time to teach the new guy some new stuff.

But, don't think it's a good idea to take a day off during these turbulent times, so have to go :(

Random Tag

Well, I've been tagged by Paul (Again), thanks Paul,

1. I'm deeply affected by my loved ones moods.

2. I always feel I deserve better than my neighbours.

3. Self-imposing characters affect negatively on my personal sense of security.

4. I have a chronic digestion problem, due to the fact that I don't chew food at all.

5. I'm quite a good judge of character, even people I heard of and haven't met.

6. I'm over-protective, think too much and have a tendency to link past conversations with current ones to draw a bigger picture.

7. A characteristic I have in common with the elephants, I never forget.

8. My stomach hurts like hell.

9. Unlike what most people think, I'm a very impatient person, I hate having to repeat myself time and again, however I'm very persistent, how this paradox came to happen, beats me.

10. My favourite time of the day is when I'm with my fiancee.

11. I'm quite finicky, to the point of appearing rude.

12. I hate this tag.

13. I'm totally intolerant of stupidity backed up by stubbornness.

14. I hate children, particularly when they're noisy.

15. I'm suspicious of people to the point of paranoia sometimes, maybe that's cause I was too trusty before, and got bitten in the posterior parts once too often.

16. I was on the verge of alcohol addiction, but managed in time.

17. I never ever tried hash, or any sort of narcotics.

18. I almost killed someone in high school, he came off lightly with a concussion though.

19. I had 23 ex-gf's

20. Once, I farted in public, while asleep in a train, it was so loud it woke me up, to find everyone staring at me.

21. I love my fiancee more than I've ever believed myself to be capable of love.

22. I hate human flies.

23. Pushing me around drives me crazy and provokes very violent reactions.

24. I think a lot before speaking or posting, often reviewing my posts, or refraining from speaking till I make sure nothing I say is offensive to anyone.

25. My psyche affects my physical health dramatically.

Hell, pay attention, FOCUS!!!!!

We come back today to episode 3 of the adventures of Slop and his apprentice Garada.

So, the guy worked yesterday on something I'd told him about, lo and behold, the Great Garada sends me the report without even bothering to check whether the totals match.

So, I have this, sales total = X, The breakdown of the sales by product = X+Y.

Can't he even match totals, has he finally taken leave of his senses??!!!!

Ok, back to finance 101 with you.

****Banging head on the desk ****

I'll be back after these messages.

Who's who?

Ok, so our CFO walked in on me about 10 minutes ago to ask me how the closing was going.

I know through my contacts that it's held due to technical issues with the system, but, it's not my job, I'm not involved with the monthly closing, accounting closes the period, I do the reporting and variance analysis.

Quite simple, why ask me, I already have too much on my hand, it's enough that I've got my normal work to go looking after other people's work.

This whole situation where all roles are mixed up is not comfortable at all, it hasn't yet been decided who I'm reporting to in the first place, neither is my title, job grade or whether I'm a department or I follow another department.

First settle these pendings then ask me to take over additional responsibilities, it's enough that I'm handling 4 countries unoffially

Interruptions

Why is it that people can't understand the word "I have work to do?"

Take today for example, my dad has trouble with his PC, I'm at work, obviously, I'm WORKING.

He calls me up, telling me that he has trouble, I tell him I can't help right now, and he decides to call some engineer to look at it, as obviously, he can't wait till I'm home tonight.

10 minutes later, he calls again to inform me that he called the guy, good news, I guess.

15 more minutes, "I wanna create a backup", ok, buy an external hard drive, he goes downstairs to buy a hard drive, then calls "What do I do with it?"

So, I gave him a crash course on copying and pasting.

Now, "It's taking too long to copy".

Oh, ffs, I'm trying to concentrate on my JOB, the one thats' paying my SALARY, what's so URGENT????????????????????????????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!